


Wendy the Almost-Slayer

by IncomingAlbatross



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Alternate Universe - Buffy The Vampire Slayer Fusion, Cemeteries, Ex-Potential Wendy, Friendship, Gen, Inspired by Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV), Slayer Mabel, but lowkey, canon-typical crushes, not canon-compliant for either verse, some light slaying, the usual y'know?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-29
Updated: 2020-06-29
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:21:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,056
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24635260
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IncomingAlbatross/pseuds/IncomingAlbatross
Summary: Wendy Corduroy, eighteen and newly aged out of Potential Slayerhood, has finally returned home to the little town of Gravity Falls. She expected trouble acclimating to the "normal" world again...But, for better or for worse, Gravity Falls hasalwaysheld more weirdness than expected. Maybe even the kind of weirdness that can make a place for a Watcher-trained, undersocialized, newly destiny-free teenager.(Vampire Slayer AU, but no more than casual knowledge of Buffy is required for reading comprehension)
Relationships: Wendy Corduroy & Dipper Pines
Comments: 4
Kudos: 8





	Wendy the Almost-Slayer

**Author's Note:**

> So I _do_ have more of this verse in my head, with roles for the rest of the characters and so on, this is the only story idea that's ever taken solid, manageable form. So I'm just going with that, right now, and posting this as a standalone oneshot.
> 
> (And to elaborate on the summary's note: this is loosely compliant with Buffyverse lore, but I wasn't trying too hard for accuracy. And it's absolutely not canon-compliant; it's a GF AU set in 2015, so for convenience's sake just assume none of the events of BtVS ever happened here.)

The teenage girl strode through the night, hands tucked in her jeans pockets, eyes sweeping her surroundings. Everything about her face and posture said, loudly and clearly, that she knew what she was doing and would take no interference—not from the graves she was weaving between, not from the dark or the cold, and _certainly_ not from anyone stupid enough to try and get in her way.

And then, off in the distance, someone screamed, and someone else yelled angrily.

Her head jerked up, an expression of angry exasperation crossing her face for a second, and then she broke into a run. Hair streaming behind her, hurdling over the gravestones in her way like a parkour champion, she sped straight for the sound.

Someone—the shape was unclear—lay huddled on the ground, face in their knees. In front of them stood a second figure—a teenager, it looked like—empty arms held out protectively as if to shield them, and over them both loomed one of the undead. Tall, strong, yellow eyes gleaming out of a face contorted into a monstrous snarl, the vampire was advancing.

The girl gave a sharp, piercing whistle as she ran.

The vampire looked around, startled. He saw a girl, or perhaps a young woman, charging towards him, green eyes glinting with determination, long red hair streaming behind her. As she ran, she unhooked a light axe from her back, whirling it skillfully.

Hissing, he dove straight for her…and was knocked back flat onto the ground.

She stood over him like Nemesis incarnate, foot planted on his chest and axe raised high. Doomed, he stared up at her, knowing who she must be.

“Slayer…” he breathed.

But her eyes only grew harder. “I’m not the Slayer,” she said flatly.

And, as her axe fell, the last thing the vampire heard was her voice, ringing through the night.

“I’m a _friggin’_ _CORDUROY!”_

* * *

Wendy straightened, stowing her axe on her back again and trying to finger-comb her hair into submission. Friggin’ _vampires_ , man…

She glanced at the other two figures. “You okay?” The huddled one was still on the ground, apparently not recovered from the whole “near-death experience” thing, but she could see him better now. They were _both_ teenage boys, it looked like—the scared one about her age, the other probably a few years younger? And…the younger one was staring at her, wide-eyed and open-mouthed.

 _Great._ Wendy bit her lip. _How do social interactions?_ “Vampire get your tongue?”

The younger boy—brown hair, mostly round face, bright eyes, wearing a Star of David baseball cap--whirred into excited action. “That was _awesome!_ Thanks so much, you really saved our necks—no pun intended, heh heh.” He rubbed the back of his neck, smiling up at her. “What’s your name? And I know you’re not the Slayer, but those were Slayer moves, right…?”

She blinked. “Yeah. Dude, you know about Slayers?”

He laughed. “Uh, guess I should introduce myself.” Since they were still standing about five feet apart, he waved awkwardly instead of holding out a hand. “I’m Dipper Pines. Current Slayer’s twin brother.”

“Oh. Uh, Wendy Corduroy! Nice to meet you. I was a Potential, until I turned eighteen last week and they cut me loose.” She grinned at him. “Too bad for them, amirite?”

“Ha, _yeah!_ ” Dipper laughed and then coughed. “So, what are you doing in town? Are you, uh, related to Manly Dan’s family…?”

“Dude, Manly Dan’s my dad! I haven’t been home in years, but you can bet I’m sticking around for a while now that whole ‘training’ thing’s over.” She frowned. “How about you? I didn’t think Slayers were _allowed_ to have twin brothers…”

He snorted, awkwardness momentarily conquered by bitterness. “Yeah, well, there were special circumstances. Getting rid of me was more trouble than it was worth, in the end.”

Ooh. Looked like he wasn’t crazy about the traditional Slayer-Watcher setup either… _That_ was refreshing.

Then a new voice added itself to the conversation. _“Wendy Corduroy?”_

“Uhhh… That is my name.” She looked down. The other kid had finally pulled himself together, it looked like. He was skinny, with emo black hair, a long nose and longer chin, and a dark baggy hoodie. Something about him was familiar…

“Wha—this is crazy! Last time I saw you you were, like, a little girl!” He stared at her with obvious recognition.

She squinted, and suddenly the pieces clicked. “Oh, heck! Robbie? _Robbie Valentino?_ ”

He smiled. “You remember me!”

“Dude.” Wendy snorted. “You were wearing that hoodie when I _left._ ”

He glanced down at his black jacket, with its sewn-together bleeding heart on the front. Technically, it probably wasn’t the _exact_ same one, but it looked identical to Wendy’s memories. (It was nice to see some things hadn’t changed, even if they were just Robbie Valentino’s weird fashion sense.) “Yeah, well, it’s my look,” he said, a little defensively.

She raised her hands. “Hey, you do you, man. I mean, that might not be the _best_ look if you want to steer clear of vampires, but you do still live in the cemetery, right? So at that point I guess you might as well embrace it.”

Robbie started to get up, and she stepped closer to offer him a hand. “So hey, how _is_ everyone? The old gang still around? How’s Tambry? And Sara? And, uh, Nate and Lee? I just got back, I haven’t seen _anyone_ yet.”

He let himself be pulled up—fingerless gloves? Really? Just _why—_ and stood there, holding on to her hand just a little too long. She removed it gently but firmly. “Uh, everyone’s good, I guess. I mean, Sara’s family moved away a few years ago, but the rest are good! Nate and Lee are, y’know, them—I don’t think they’ve changed much since they were ten.” He chuckled. “Tambry you’ll have to ask her phone—she spends way more time interacting with _that_ than with actual human beings—but she’s fine.”

Wendy shoved her hands in her pockets, trying to process. “Okay, cool. I mean, not cool about Sara, but the rest is cool. I should get a phone, I guess…” If she could find the money. Dad was happy she was back, and all, but she knew that if she didn’t find a job she’d just be an added mouth to feed and she didn’t know what family finances were like. And it wasn’t like Slayer training had given her a lot of marketable skills…

“But seriously, enough about Gravity Falls,” Robbie continued. “Gravity Falls is _boring._ ” She heard a snort behind her, presumably from Dipper. “When did you learn to—to behead people like that?!”

Wendy looked over her shoulder to Dipper, uncertain. He was frowning, but at her glance he straightened, shrugged and made an “eh” gesture with one hand. “Mabel—my sister’s—had to rescue him from vamps like twice already. He’s basically in the know.”

She nodded, flashing him a grateful smile, and turned back to Robbie. “Okay, then, this Mabel girl? I’ve basically spent the last six years training to be what she is. Didn’t get the superpowers, because that’s some kind of ‘Destiny’ thing, but I still got all the skills.” She put one hand on her hip. “ _And_ I got Corduroy skills, which are even _better._ ”

“Uh, yeah. That was _amazing._ I mean, Mabel’s nice and all, but you’re clearly way better at this—no offence, Dipper. I mean, she’s a kid, and you’re…”

“A teenager?” Wendy suggested, frowning a little. She turned to have Robbie and Dipper in her field of vision at the same time—yep, Dipper’s face _definitely_ said “ _OFFENCE,”_ loud and clear. “Don’t diss the Slayer, man. She’s got enough going on without me pretending I’m better than her.”

Dipper smiled, though there was still an edge to his expression. “Shouldn’t you be going home, Robbie?” he suggested politely. “Y’know, before another vampire decides you’re an easy meal.”

“Sure, whatever,” Robbie said, clearly embarrassed and trying not to show it. Wendy felt a little bad—she hadn’t wanted to fight with her childhood friend (enemy? Acquaintance? Whatever he’d been) within five minutes of meeting him. On the other hand, though, dissing the poor kid who’d gotten handed the Slayer role was _not_ okay. “I’ll see you around, right, Wendy?”

She smiled, relieved by the overture. “Yeah, course. Like I said, I’m sticking around for a while, now that I’m really back.”

“Cool, cool. Night, then. Night, Dipper.” With a wave, Robbie began trudging up the hill towards the Valentino house, weaving his way through the tombstones.

Wendy and Dipper stood there in silence for a few moments, looking after him.

“One of us should probably—”

“—walk him home?”

“Yeah.”

“Yeah.”

They hurried after him.

“Hey, just making sure you don’t die before you get home!” Dipper said, falling in to one side of the older teen. “Be a shame to waste Wendy’s kill, right?”

“Eh, practice is always nice,” Wendy said. “But yeah, safety in numbers, right Robbie?” She punched him lightly in the shoulder, and immediately regretted it. Were they shoulder-punching friends at this point?

He shrugged, but then smiled at her, so it was probably okay. “Yeah, okay, sure. Thanks, guys.”

They trudged up the hill in silence. As they reached the porch, Robbie asked suddenly, “Hey, Wendy, do you want to come in and say hi to my parents?”

“Uhhh…” She really didn’t have the energy for another social interaction today. Not with people who would recognize her and make friendly conversation—and Robbie’s parents were _very_ friendly people. “Thanks, Robbie, but not tonight. I really gotta get home—I was just out for a walk to clear my head.”

“In the cemetery?” Dipper asked skeptically. She grinned at him.

“Hey, I took my axe with me. And I’m an almost-Slayer, that’s gotta count for something.”

He shrugged, smiling. “Well, uh, I can’t argue with the results, I guess!”

“Dude. I should hope not.”

They reached the front door. “Well, uh, good night, guys. You sure you don’t wanna come in, Wendy?”

She shook her head, smiling. “Nah. Tell your folks I said hi, though, if you want. I’ll see you sometime later.”

“Okay.” Robbie stood there for a moment, his hand on the doorknob. “Good night, then, I guess. Thanks for saving my neck, Wendy.”

Dipper cleared his throat.

“And you, yeah,” Robbie said, rolling his eyes. “Even though you didn’t do that much…”

“Hey, it’s not like I was expecting a vampire fight,” Dipper justified himself. “And my hat bought us at least a minute or two—you really need to get _something_ protective, Robbie. Wear a cross or something, like your parents, geez.”

“Look, crosses just aren’t _me,_ okay?”

“Yeah, well, if you get bitten and turned _you_ won’t be you, so maybe make some sacrifices image-wise?”

“Yeah…” Robbie stopped, deflating a bit. “Yeah, sure, I’ll think about it. G’night. _Again._ ”

“Good night, Robbie.”

“Sleep tight,” Wendy added.

Dipper snorted. “Don’t let the vampires bite!”

“Ugh, _whatever._ ” Robbie trudged into his house, almost—but not quite—slamming the door behind him.

Wendy grinned at Dipper. “So, where were you headed? Safety in numbers, right?”

“Wh—oh! Uh, I live over that way. I think.” He pointed. “But you don’t have to stick with me, I’ll be okay.”

She raised an eyebrow. “Do you have any weapons on you? Because _I’ve_ got Archibald.” She pulled out her axe for a moment to heft it.

“…Archibald?”

Wendy shrugged. “It’s a family name.”

“…Fair. And, yeah, okay, I guess you’ve got a point…I wasn’t really _planning_ to walk through the graveyard tonight, tonight was supposed to be quiet.” He paused. “Which way are you?”

“We’ve got a cabin out in the woods…roughly that direction.” She pointed too, about ninety degrees off from Dipper’s home.

Dipper frowned. “If you come home with me, Ford could give you a ride home.”

“Ford?”

“Our Watcher—well, Mabel’s Watcher, but. Y’know.” Despite his half-displayed cynicism earlier, he showed no discomfort or distaste now. Huh.

Wendy made an “eh” face anyway, though. “Thanks, man, but I’ll be good. Like I said, I’ve got Archibald…and most things in the woods know to stay clear of a Corduroy, anyway.” She grinned at him.

“Well, if you’re _sure…_ You’ve done all the heavy lifting tonight, I don’t want to leave you hanging.”

“I’m sure! Don’t sweat it, man, I don’t mind a little more walking. And hey, I’m pretty sure you saved Robbie’s life before I got there tonight, so.” She held out a fist to him. “Not-Quite-Slayer teamwork?”

He looked at her fist for a moment, with an oddly crooked smile, and then bumped it with his own. “Teamwork,” he agreed.

She smiled. “Cool.”

They turned, and began walking towards town.

“So,” Wendy said after a minute or two. “Your hat’s religious protection? That’s pretty neat.”

Dipper glanced up, startled. “Huh? Oh! Yeah.” He tugged self-consciously at his hat brim. “We’re Jewish—well, sort of, Jewish on my dad’s side—and I always wear a hat anyway, so when I found this…” He shrugged. “Just felt right, y’know? Mabel has a lot of sweaters with crosses and stars and stuff, but this is simpler.”

“Yeah, that’s cool,” Wendy said sincerely. “I gotta get a cross to wear myself…maybe tomorrow.” Maybe she’d be able to find something of her Mom’s…

“So, uh. Will you be going to Gravity Falls High School?”

She shrugged. “I guess… Haven’t exactly had a _normal_ education so far, but there’s still most of a semester left, right? Probably a good idea to do it while I can, get the ‘full teen experience.’” She had no idea what she would do with herself after high school, but…she’d chop down that tree when she got to it.

“Yeah… It’s not great, but Mabel and I nagged Ford until he let us go anyway.” Dipper smiled reminiscently. “I think the Council got on his back about it, but we were just Potentials then so they didn’t care as much.”

“That’s…still pretty cool,” Wendy said slowly. “I never could’ve talked my Watcher into something like public school.”

He looked up, expression changing into embarrassed sympathy. “Oh, yeah… We got _really_ lucky with Ford. But also…strength in numbers, y’know?” She saw him smile as he realized he was quoting her earlier words. “Mabel and I have helped each other a lot these past few years.”

“I bet,” Wendy said enviously. “…How old are you guys, anyway?”

“Oh, uh… Fifteen.” Dipper ducked his head for a second. “We’re sophomores. I guess you’ll be a senior if you start school, right?”

“If I test into the right grade, yeah,” she said wryly. “…I think I’m gonna give it a shot, though.”

He looked up, smiling in surprise. “Really?”

“Yeah.” She thought about it. “Yeah, I am! I mean, it’s where all my old friends are, all the people our age…If I want to fit into Gravity Falls again, that’s probably the best way to start.” And it _really_ didn’t hurt to know that Dipper and his Slayer sister would be there. Even if she had to fall a couple grades in some subjects, she wouldn’t be alone—she’d have people there from the same world as her, people who _got_ it.

“Yeah, I guess that makes sense.” Dipper was watching the landscape around them, hand tugging at his hat brim again.

Wendy cast around for something else to talk about, and realized what had been bugging her since they met. “So…why’s the Slayer _here?_ I mean, there’s normally a reason for that kind of thing, right?”

Dipper looked back, eyes bright and interested. “Oh! Didn’t you know? I mean, I guess you wouldn’t if you had to leave as a kid…" He shook himself. “Yeah. Gravity Falls is on top of a Hellmouth.”

“ _Seriously?_ ” Then Wendy stopped and thought for a second. “Oh. _Huh._ That…explains a lot, really.”

“Less than you would think, actually!” Dipper said brightly, perking up in clear fascination for this topic. “There’s a _lot_ of weirdness around here that doesn’t match _any_ typical manifestations of Hellmouth energy or the things drawn to it, and we’re not sure what’s caused them. Ford and I think maybe…"

He kept up that topic the rest of the way home, with Wendy sometimes giving actual input but often just nodding and making encouraging noises. Clearly he was a _heck_ of a nerd on the supernatural front… She didn’t really mind listening, though. He was pretty good at remembering he was talking to another actual person, and not just himself or the imaginary Ideal Audience her Watcher’d seemed to think she was when _he_ got started. And, given that, it was kinda cool to hear about this stuff from someone who found it _that_ interesting.

But eventually they did reach his place—a house in town, kind of rundown, but with a light on downstairs.

“Oh, heck,” Dipper said, seeing it. “Ford and Mabel have probably been wondering where I was…” He hastily dug a phone out of his pocket and checked it. “Okay, only two missed texts, they weren’t _that_ worried.” He looked at Wendy, a little awkwardly. “I know you need to get home, and walking with me’s already made me later, but if you want to come in feel free! Only if you want to, though, obviously…I mean…”

She held up a hand, grinning. “Thanks, man, but yeah. I really do want to get home. I’ll meet Mabel and your Watcher some other time, though—I mean, not like any of us are going anywhere!”

“Yeah! Definitely!” he agreed, nodding. “So, uh…I guess I’ll see you around, then, right?”

“Totally,” she said. “See you around, Dipper. Safety in numbers, right?”

He laughed, walking to his front door. “Safety in numbers! Good night, Wendy!”

“Night, Dipper!” she called back, and watched him go in.

When the door was shut, she turned and started towards her own home, with a spring in her step that hadn’t been there earlier. She’d found an old friend _and_ a new one today…and learned Gravity Falls was weirder than she’d ever known.

Maybe she could fit in here again, after all.

**Author's Note:**

> If you have any questions about this AU, ask away—I may not be planning to write in it anytime soon, but that doesn't mean I can't share worldbuilding thoughts!
> 
> (Also, I know I had about two sentences in here re: Dipper's Jewish heritage, and I tried to get those right, but if I said something stupid/wrong there PLEASE feel free to let me know. I'd appreciate it.)


End file.
